Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Update: My Job Scavenger Hunt

Back in September, in  my tribute to Gmail, I told the world that I applied to 233 jobs and I received about 5 rejection letters.  Since then, things have been looking up. I've been inundated by rejection letters.  Every day, I get one or two and sometimes three. I get them by email mostly, but I have received a few via snail mail.  The rejection letters via snail mail are so kind to... it makes me think I'm almost human and worth the amount of postage spent on the letter.  So, things are changing. I feel it!  

I can only speculate why this is happening.  I have been applying for jobs for nearly 6 months because I saw that my head might be on the chopping block (and I was right).  Is it possible that the positions were open to accepting applications for that long?  Or did it take them that long to sift through the applications because there were so many.  Whatever it is, I'm sure that it's a good thing because things are moving.  And I, unlike recent grads, have experience as an attorney.  So my chances of getting something are small, but not infinitesimal.  

Now, I've applied to about 300 places at least.  I've had 4 interviews and I'm waiting to hear back from only one of them.  

Being unemployed is the worst because you have lots of free time and tremendous fear of spending money... so you end up sleeping most of the day and catching up on TV.  Bus fare is hardly worth the risk.

My friend, Sarah, called me today and told me about this great deal on trips to the Caribbean.  "I'm unemployed, Sarah.  Did you forget?"  

"Well, it's so little though!"

"What if I'm unemployed in 6 months.  Will I look back on my Caribbean vacation fondly? I don't think so.  I  think I'll be pissed at you for suggesting I spend money on a effing vacation."

And how much would I enjoy a vacation anyhow?  Knowing I'm going back to nothing but my couch and remote control

So, I'm home, hoarding my pennies and praying that the job comes before the savings go.  I am eating nasty food because it's in my cupboard and I can't justify a trip to Whole foods, because that is a luxury.  A tv dinner is practical and cheap.

I have yet to get my first unemployment check. I'm not even sure what's happening with that. I'm so annoyed at this point, I can't even bear calling them up to ask.

I am painting again.  It's a hobby that I have. I'm horrible at it, but I like my work product. Most of my apartment is filled with my own creations. I didn't paint for the last 6 months of my employment because I was so stressed out. I couldn't find inspiration.  

I have yet to forebear my student loans.  Might be a dumb move. I know I can forebear for 3 years without questions.  But I'm still holding onto the hope that I'll pop out a baby one day and want to stay home with him for the first 3 years of his life... and at that point, I could cash out that option.

Is the dream still alive?  The dream being "gainful employment"?  Yes. It's alive.  But it's on life support and there is a chance of recovery, but the doctor hasn't determined whether or not the brain stem shows signs of life.

Let's pray it doesn't meet the same fate as Terri.

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