It's Soooo Glamorous to be an Attorney.

Today, I had to file a complaint, file affidavits of service and buy a judge (pay for an RJI) so that I can have a motion heard.

I went to the basement of the courthouse and paid for my index number.  The clerk laughed at me because I forgot to write "Summons" on the Summons.  She made me write in by hand. My bad. I need a secretary.
I asked her if I could pay for an RJI (Request for Judicial Intervention) at this window.  She directed me to go to a room on the first floor.

I went to that room. I waited in line, behind a bunch of Chinese-Americans who were there to get their passports.  After 15 minutes, I realize that I could have gone around those people and I walk up to the window.  She takes a look and says, "you have to go to the room next door to have this RJI form approved before you pay for it."

I go to the room next door and I meet with the motions clerk.  He looks over my documents, makes me make a few changes by hand and tells me that I have to go back to the first room (no, the second room) to pay for it, then I need to bring back two copies of the motion and two copies of the RJI. If I don't bring back those documents, my motion won't be on the calendar.

Okay.
I go and wait in line.  This time, it's a real line.  I am behind attorneys and clerks.  I get within eye shot of the window and I notice that I have to have copies of the RJI before I pay for it. Shit.  I step out of line and go to the copiers to make said copies.

They are 35 cents a copy.  I have nothing on me besides tens and fives.  Ugh.  There are two people standing at the copiers looking for change.  I leave this room and head down to the record room, where I know there are copiers.  I take the stairs because I've already spent too much time at the courthouse and I can't handle waiting for the elevators.

I slip into the record room. I see two copiers. I head towards them and see a sign that says they are not for public use.

I walk around the bend and I see 4 copiers for public use.  Once again 35 cents a copy, but these machines are equipped to take bills.  There's one catch: it only takes OLD five dollar bills.  What?

I open my wallet and take out my three five dollar bills and I notice that they are all NEW five dollar bills.  I note to myself that I haven't even had to think about this distinction, ever.

I run upstairs to the convenience store in the courthouse and buy gum. I don't eat gum, but I wanted to break my stinking five so I can make my copies... I need about 12 copies.  That's about $4.20.

I go back to the basement to make copies with my new one dollar bills. I stick my document on the glass and the stinking machine says it doesn't have paper to match my document.  No letter sized paper?  Really?

I open up all of the drawers and the machine only has letter sized paper. I start pressing buttons and finally, the little green light says that it will let me proceed.  I make two copies, and another two copies of another document. I bend over to look at them and they are facing the wrong direction and at about 25% of original size.  Shit.

So, I'm down about $1.40 and I have no copies.  I don't have enough to make the remainder of the copies either. I head back upstairs to buy more gum.

I come back downstairs and I finish making my Godforsaken copies.

I'm not done yet.

I head up to the cashier's office where I pay for the RJI and I pay for it--finally. I run over to the motion clerk's office and give him all of his documentation.  I've been in the courthouse about an hour longer than I had planned.

I step to the front of the courthouse and there is a torrential downpour.

What's glamorous about this job again?
This is real life. It's not LA Law and unless you're rolling in dough, this is the shit that you have to do to make it as a solo.  My friends tell me I should hire a law school graduate... hire being a loose term because it would be unpaid... to take care of this crap for me.  But my morals tell me that's wrong. I blog about the pains of being a new graduate and I would hate to "employ" someone that despised me for not paying them or not paying them adequately.  Could I?  Should I?

But that doesn't change the premise of this blog. There are plenty of attorneys at the courthouse tending to these matters on their own. It's not pretty. It's not glamorous and it's not aspirational. It's the shit in shit law.

Chasing Money....

When I was an associate at a small firm, there were many aspects of the practice that turned me off.  There was the boss who was constantly yelling at someone for something.  He would get so red in the face that I feared he'd keel over with a stroke or heart attack.  There was the delayed paydays.  Initially, payday was on Thursday and somehow it migrated to Tuesdays in the 3 years I was there.  You never got your paycheck or a raise unless you begged for it.  Actually crying and pretending to quit were highly effective ways of dealing with these issues, since I was a valued employee.  The lack of health insurance and vacation time.  I could go to the doctor and my boss would pay for it in cash, but it had to be a client of the firm so some barter type of payment could be made out.  Most times, I would go to the local pediatrician for my aches and pains. Thank God I didn't get pregnant or get AIDS.  And, of course, the general lack of human rights afforded to most Americans...  like taking a sick day without an hourly phone call checking up on the status of my health and whether I needed a ride into the office or the constant phone calls at all hours for nothing special.  Most of that could be chalked up to my boss' personality, I suppose.

But what I hated more than anything was chasing down money.  I hated that there were cases I felt passionately about... and my boss would instruct me to get the check from the client or walk out of court.  I wanted to get my paycheck and do my job and not worry about how the firm was paid.  Sometimes, my boss would tell me to call my client and talk about their balance.  Since I wasn't responsible for the bill,  I would plead with my client. I would ask that they pay the bill so that I can continue righting a wrong and advocating them zealously.  I didn't think of my time as charity... but I guess that is how they thought of it.  But, as an associate, I wasn't the bad guy. I just wanted to do my job.

Now, I'm taking on cases and trying to break into the solo market.  Surprisingly, the clients haven't been hard to find (knock on wood!).  After all, it's a recession and people are screwing people out of money left and right.  But, the clients once again want lots to be done for nothing.  NOTHING.  I'm on edge because I've been sending a reminder to pay to a client every day for 10 days, all for a measly $100. I did about 3 hours of free legal work that I'm not charging him for.  The bastard hasn't paid me yet.  Because I'm not an associate, it's not about my mean boss forcing me to walk out of court when you need me most... it's about disrespect and lack of consideration.  Just because the tools I gained in law school come out of my mouth and aren't a product resulting from skilled craftsmanship, I still deserve to be paid.

So, if this type of behavior continues, I can imagine I will become my red-faced boss when it comes to legal fees. I can only pray that I find myself a way out of this hole by then.

So, I found these articles interesting/helpful in regards to solos and small firms and the pitfalls of practicing during the recession.

Apparently, a ton of California lawyers are in such economic dire straits that they are stealing from clients and being disbarred in droves.

Here's some helpful tips for making your small practice recession-proof.

God help me!

So, What's the Worst that Can Happen to Me?

A friend forwarded me this article to brighten my spirits, but it had the opposite effect.  Apparently, since Big Law associates are being deferred until 2012, contract attorneys will be leaned on more than ever.  As all my readers must know, being a contract attorney means that you have no stability and no benefits.  You are completely subject to the whim of a firm. You the modern day factory worker, much like Jurgis Rudkus from The Jungle.  You're nameless and faceless and often kept in the dungeons of the firm. 

But, I guess it's good news for people that don't mind living on the edge and people who never aspire to get hired again.  But, I'm not so sure I'm one of these people.  I guess I'm a bit of a control freak and document review is the antithesis of control.  You are told the rate at which to work, because you are given quotas.  You are also told the times at which you should work and how long your work week must be--both minimum and maximum hours.  You are also forced to take a lunch break on many projects.  So, because I don't think I'll get hired (and considering people are being deferred until 2012) I'm taking the plunge into the real "Deep End" and going solo, in an attempt to control my destiny ever so slightly.

So, as it stands, I'm attempting to supplement my document review with a solo practice until document review supplements a solo practice. There's no glory in this. It's what I have to do to stay pertinent to the current market. As I stated before, I'm pretty convinced that law firms will not be hiring full time employees with benefits anytime soon and I'll be damned if I sit there and hope for temp projects as they are slowly shipped to India. I have more pride than that.

So, the costs are mounting. I had to buy office supplies. A better printer with a scanner. A file cabinet will be next on the list.  I bought letterhead and business cards.  Hence far, the costs have been minimal.

But there's one hurdle that I need to jump--legal malpractice insurance.

I did a little search on-line and the costs were crazy... over $1000 a year with $5000 and $10000 deductibles.  So, I got in touch with someone that I knew through someone (I've been pushing that networking thing, Managing Partner)  And she had the best rate I have heard of hence far.... $900 a year! 

And she also went on to tell me that it goes up every year (one would think you'd be less of risk with more experience).

This brings me to my point... what is the worst that would happen?

Ready or Not, the World is Going Solo!

THIS POST IS PRIMARILY FOR LAID OFF ATTORNEYS WITH LEGAL SKILLS OR A PRACTICE AREA.

So, I've been out of work for a good long while. I can't say that my job search has been intensifying. It's been dwindling. Partially from my own doing, but also because of the type of job search that I decided to do. I only apply to jobs that I'm qualified for. I'm not in the business of wasting my time or an employer's time. I pride myself in honestly saying, "I am the best candidate for this position." Consequently, I am running out of jobs to apply to... after applying to nearly 400 or so. At this point, I'll spend a solid 20 minutes on an on-line application to find out that I have already submitted a resume for that same position. I'm also tired from hours and hours of document review. I'm at a point now, where I need to move on mentally from the idea of finding "full-time employment."

Timing is certainly my forte, so no surprise that I ran into this article which speaks to my point. As the economy tanks, more and more people will find themselves "freelancing" or "consulting"--or in legal terms going "solo."

I know... going solo is the LAST thing that many lawyers want or can do. But this article has some good advice for those that are going to stop putting their lives on hold, waiting for the great job that lurks around the corner, and start to live life from this point forward:


"Too many freelancers see their condition as only temporary—one that will go away as soon as economic conditions improve. It's just a stage between jobs, they figure."

"Some of them may be right. But the odds are that most are wrong. They're going to be on their own for a long time. So freelancers need to think in terms of the long haul, preparing for a marathon, not a sprint."


When I read this, I think about all of the attorneys I know that are doing document review all over the country, waiting for the next best thing when they can be out there establishing a business. You have to stop thinking of this as a temporary condition, so you can free yourself to do what's best for your future. Just think? What if this is your forever? I don't think document review is a horrid existence. It's better than nothing, but do you always want to be subject to the ebbs and flows of the market???

Btw, I know I'm referring to the document review as being synonomous with freelancing. Unfortunately, there are some bright line distinctions; the main one is that you are considered an employee of the temp agency when you do doc review, whereas you are an idependent contractor when you freelance. W-2 verses a 1099. But, like in freelancing, you are moving from one project to another and you have no stability and no benefits. You're not paid for sick days. It's a tumultuous existence. I would argue that doc reviewers would benefit from becoming independent contractors, but alas... the pimp daddy agencies won't have that. In any case, I think that this is the closest to being a consultant that any lawyer gets. And for the purposes of this discussion, they are similar enough.

What if this is all there is???

Why are you doing document review for $28/hour when you can be coupling that with per diem depositions for $50/hour? Or writing motions for $65/hour? This is how you start your business and get good experience at the same time. Don't think that this is something you're doing for the short term. Let's assume that you'll never ever find a full-time job. Throw yourself into per diem work and you will get more and more business--and one day a client will be entirely yours. I know per diem work is elusive, but not so much as a full-time job. I have my finger on the pulse of the legal industry... and I will tell you that small firms are not lacking work. But they are having commitment issues. They need someone to do the work, but they don't want to pay for benefits. So, drop in on some small law offices and tell them that you're willing to help for an hourly rate. You will get the appropriate experience that way, and it may serve as a segue to getting your own clients.

Or, even better, don't do document review and think that you're just one interview away from the ultimate job. If you always dreamt of having a cafe or a child care business, why are you holding yourself up in that dream. Take steps to pursue something else. There are people who have bene unemployed since May 2008 and this time could have been used to do a start-up company. I know it sounds crazy and unattainable. But thinking that you're going to land in BigLaw when this storm dies down sounds just as crazy to me.

But, back to doc review attorneys... the article says:

"Most successful consultants are in a network or community of consultants. These networks are important sources of new clients; most consultants, in fact, say they get as many clients from these networks as they do from client referrals. What's more, an increasing number of consultants share work, taking on bigger projects that require more hands. In this way, teams of consultants can function like a small boutique firm."

Just last week, in my room of doc reviewers... we were discussing our practice areas before the bottom fell out :

Real Estate!

Tax!

Estates!

Worker's Comp!

Family!


Isn't it apparent the we essentially have the resources of a full service law firm at our fingers? I'm not saying that I'm signing partnership agreements with anyone. But if anyone were to come with me, in search of a will and a trust... why wouldn't I draft the will and send the trust to the estates lawyer to do??? I hate lawyers just as much as the next guy, but this is a case of brotherhood and comradery. I think that we can accomplish much more together than we can apart.

Time to take this bull by the horns and control your own fate. Yah, it sucks to be 100% in charge of what you're paid and when you're paid it. But it's not worse than being subject to the whim and will of inconsiderate partners. They screwed you before. Do you really want to be caught with your pants down if they do it again?

Look. I know we're not going to make a ton of money doing this stuff. I've kissed the American Dream good-bye. I don't look at solos with envy. I think that it's a hard life and very few make it. But, times are desparate, and I'm just looking to pay my bills and make it. It's foolhardy to sit by and watch the legal industry take a new shape... and hope and wish that it has a place for you in it.

That American Dream is looking more and more like an illusion than ever before and I'm trying to hustle to make a buck.

Wall of Shame Part III: New and Creative Ways of Making Money as a Solo!

Leon Gelfgatt, a Boston Solo, thought that being a solo practitioner was not lucrative enough--no secret to most attorneys.  So, to supplement his income, Mr. Gelfgatt decided to start recording fraudulent liens against properties that were about to be sold.  When time came for the property to change hands, the new mortgagee had to pay the existing secured lien holder at the closing table.  As first in line, Mr. Gelfgatt showed up to receive his due--thereby screwing the legitimate mortgagee.  Way to use you legal expertise, Mr. Gelfgatt!  Mr. Gelfgatt was figured out after making about a million dollars off of several properties.  Gelfgatt pleaded not guilty and was held on $1 million cash bail by Cambridge District Court Judge Roanne Sragow-Licht.


I can't say I don't understand his logic.  Banks are so overwhelmed with all of the distressed properties, properties in short sale and foreclosure--they might not notice a million dollar shortfall.  Or maybe he thinks that is the cost of his license to practice the law? Or it could be that he was a desperate solo who wasn't making enough money?  


I know that illegality is not endemic to solo practitioners.  But they certainly do get caught more than guys at the white glove firms.  Aside from that, solos are put under the magnifying glass by the state bar associations more so than the big wigs.  Although, I have no intention of being a crook... it's enough to make me scratch my head and wonder whether being a solo is a viable option.  Will I be tempted to co-mingle my clients funds with my own to pay for my bar dues?  Will I feel the need to guarantee results in order to land a client?  Will I have to give a short term loan to a client who needs the money NOW so that they won't fire me and go onto the next firm who will?  These are issues that we studied in Legal Ethics.  These are also issues that I saw when I worked at small law firms.  I'm just wondering if it's possible to NOT starve as a solo, and to follow the rules.  


As one commentator on the article said:  
Its so much easier to go the usual route: just create phony billing and have a specially assigned judge help fleece the clients. The scam is foolproof, and there's no no risk of jail time.
Thoughts?